Stuff I like

After enjoying Stuff White People Like (it's sarcastic and a bit edgy, there's your parental notification warning), I thought about making Stuff Christians Like. I had all these things in my mind, ready to start yet another blog that I forget about and post on too randomly, when I discovered today that someone stole my idea before I could think of it.

With that, I give you Stuff Christians LIke. Here's parts of some of my favorites:

#56. Talking to strangers on airplanes.
There is one way to witness to a stranger on a plane that is better than all other moves. It is such a brilliant move that we've been doing it since the Wright Brothers took their first flight. A lot of people don't know that, but there were actually three people on that first historic flight in Kitty Hawk: the two Wright brothers and a Christian that was hoping they'd have a chance to share the Lord with them.


#29. Not dancing
Know what song my wife and I had our first dance to at our wedding? It was a little ditty I call, "I was unable to dance at my wedding because we had the reception at a church and the church was opposed to dancing." The title's a little long, but I promise it has a really solid beat.

#53. Saying "I'll pray for you" and then not.
Let me start this one with an apology. If you met me between 1987 and 2005 and I told you, "I'll pray for you," that was a lie. Never happened. I probably didn't pray for you. And that's not cool. I'm not sure why we do this sometimes. I think that in some ways, "I'll pray for you" is the Christian equivalent of telling a date, "I'll give you a call," when you know that you never will. We use it like punctuation on a conversation.

#17. Unspoken Prayer Requests
P.S. Whenever I hear someone ask for an unspoken prayer request I think in my head, "that dude is having an affair, he laundered money, he is making meth in his basement or he is doing all of the above." That's why it's usually better to just be upfront.

One I will be engaged in this week, which Ergun Caner calls Protestant Purgatory:
#35. Lock-ins.
You know what would be a great idea? Let's get like 80 hormone drunk, emotionally and mentally immature 9th graders, hype them up on caffeine and cookies, give them some water balloons, shaving cream and toilet paper for pranks and then lock them all in together overnight at church with like 4 chaperons and then just see what happens? That would be a good idea right? I think we should do that. Like tonight, we should do that.

My favorite on the list so far:
#5. Bootleg cookies.
If you ever went to Vacation Bible School then you know exactly what I'm talking about. For some reason, Christians love finding ways to save money on cookies. That's why instead of Oreos you always had to eat "chocolate sandwiches" or some other cookie with a generic sounding name. And they aren't the same. I know they told you that "jungle crackers" were the same as "animal crackers" but you knew the difference, you knew.